The Dictionary of Contemporary English defines “Perplexed” as to be confused or worried by something that you do not understand. So we can translate this article to mean that, I am always baffled, confused, and always amazed by my society. Let me explain to you some of these things.

Even though I have eyes, I can’t stare freely at objects. My first visit to the famous Lagos’ Balogun market was trailed with advice from my friend which went like this, “Don’t stare too long at goods” and “Don’t stand too long in one spot”. By ‘too long’ he meant, ‘Don’t look at a good for more than 2 seconds’. The consequence for doing this is being crowded by prospective sellers and sometimes kidnapped by being dragged to their stores for a free showcase of other goods they ‘feel’ you may be interested in. I didn’t want to deal with that so I tried not to ‘stare too long’ or ‘stand too long’ throughout my stay there. Continue reading




As a child, my mother always advised me to study hard because there are limited types of job a woman can do to survive in this world. I guess what she meant was, if I don’t study, I won’t get a good white collar job and if I don’t get a good white collar job, I will turn to business or a menial job for survival and  while a man can engage in any type of business and menial work, a woman is limited to just a few. In summary, Men always have an upper hand. I can say she was not far from the truth because if you look around today, the men are taking over the formerly known ‘feminine jobs’ like hairdressers, tailors, and cooks.

While in Port Harcourt, I encountered several salons which were owned and run by men. Out of maybe 8 stylists, only 1 would be a lady and unfortunately, the guys will even out do her in the skill. There was a time when I  trusted male hairdressers than the female ones because the male ones just so happened to be excellent at what they did and they didn’t pry much into your personal life, unlike the females. Same goes for Tailoring. While at the University, my tailor was a man and he sewed so many admirable gowns for me (Oshey, Mr. Thomas). Now, a woman who isn’t fortunate enough is left to compete with these men in what’s suppose to be her niche. Continue reading